Sometimes, you need to say yes, even when you don’t really want to.
There is a personal development theme that has been going around the last several years about setting boundaries and learning to say no to things you don’t want to do. The idea is that you don’t spread yourself too thin and you don’t get taken advantage of, and thus have autonomy over your life and schedule. For some people, this is absolutely necessary and healthy. These are the people who are always the ones getting things done and making things happen. You know who I’m talking about. The ones who always volunteer for everything. The ones who genuinely spread themselves too thin. These people need a break. These people need to start saying no.
However, the problem is that these are the same people over and over. It’s the same people who volunteer every time. It’s the same people who put on events. It’s the same people who stay late to help clean up. It’s always the same people. So where is everyone else? They are saying no, that’s where they are. And they need to step up. There are becoming more and more people who never, or rarely, say yes. They don’t volunteer, they don’t pitch in, they aren’t willing to help. And to these people, you need to stop listening to the “just say no” trends, and start saying yes.
I heard an expression once that says, “If it’s not a hell yes, then it’s a hell no.” At the time, I thought that was pretty valuable. Now I’m not so sure. Does anyone really like to have to pick up garbage after an event? Not really. But does it need done? Yes. Does anyone really like to sit in the hot sun and take tickets for a rodeo? Not really. But does it need done? Yes. Does anyone really like to pick up tables and chairs after an event? Not really. But does it need done? Yes. You get my point. Not everything is a hell yes, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t need done and that you shouldn’t help do it. This is particularly important in small, rural communities where there are only so many people to go around.
So many people rely on electronic devices for their connection to other humans (outside of their family), and there is plenty of research to suggest that isn’t healthy. Many of these volunteer opportunities provide great connection to other human beings face to face. And the satisfaction that comes from volunteering and helping out without receiving anything in return is a truly great feeling. You don’t need to get paid or get praise for helping out, it’s just something you do. In life, it’s important to give more than you get. You don’t always need to receive something in return. Be strong enough to be okay with that, because you know you are contributing to the betterment of your community.
I’m going to challenge you all to start saying yes sometimes. Not all the time. Balance is key. But sometimes it needs to be a yes, even when you don’t want to do it.
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